If you could be anyone,

Would you be the one I want?

Chapter one: Stand out

"Get out of my way! Losers!" Kazuya Kamenashi's well-known voice shouted, as he got himself struggled through the crowd of busy students.

Kazuya belonged to the 'better' group. The group for the rich, smart and good-looking youngsters.He knew he was hot, he knew that every girl wanted him, he knew and he used it.As he walked down the main hall, with one of his headphones in the ear and the other one hanging over his shoulder, listening to Rammstein, he felt all the girls' eyes on him.

"They all want you so bad!" Jin Akanishi said as he and Kazuya met in front of the main entrance.

"Well, what can I do?" Kazuya asked innocent like an angel. He stroked his hand over his smooth hair and laughed briefly, while sending a seductive smile to the girls who passed by him.

"Anyway, are you ready for the Chemistry test?" Jin gave an undecided move with his head and patted the thick book he held under his arm.

"Almost, I guess. I was studying all night! The old man's going to kill me if I fail.," he pouted, though with a serious look on his face.

"You're lucky you don't have to study your ass off, like the rest of us! Chemistry is my weak side." Kazuya just raised his shoulders as a reply. They walked down the hall and entered classroom X7b, where they were going to have English.

Ten minutes after the lesson had started, the door opened and a tall, lean, black haired figure walked in. Everyone looked up.

"Hara! I'm glad you also want to take part of the class today!" Mr. Lee said as he looked at the late student. His name was Toshimasa Hara, known as Toshiya among his friends. He lived alone with his dad, who was an alcoholic. Toshiya had been suspended from school twice, because they thought he did drugs. Which he actually did. He never said much and many girls found him scary and mysterious, yet very attractive.

"Whatever," Toshiya grumbled and found his seat at the back of the classroom.

"Anyway, what I was about to say, before I got interrupted, was." Mr. Lee continued his lecturing.

"It's amazing that he never gets tired of being so boring!" Jin whispered to Kazuya.

"… So to make it a lot easier for you, I've already found your study buddies!" Mr. Lee found a piece of paper in his folder. Kazuya shook his head with a raised eyebrow. He bumped the bottom of his pencil onto the table several times and sighed.

"Great, he has probably paired me up with some gay-ass loser!" he muttered.

"Kazuya Kamenashi and Toshimasa Hara," Mr. Lee called out. Kazuya busted out a short scream.

"Mr. Lee, can't you see that pairing me up with Hara won't help any of us?" Kazuya complained as the lesson was over.

Mr. Lee just shook his head while he studied his glasses.

"I'm sorry Kazuya. But Toshimasa really needs some help if he wants to stay at this level. And I think you're the only one who can handle that."

Kazuya snorted and left the classroom, cursing loudly.

Boa Kwon played flirting with her long, brown hair, as she talked to Kazuya in her sweetest voice.

"Kame, you haven't forgotten about our date tonight, have you?" she asked.

They stood underneath one of the huge trees in front of the school.

Kazuya shook his head. He smiled widely, showing his perfect teeth like in one of those toothpaste commercials.

"No way! I would never forget a date with such a pretty girl as you!" he replied and winked at her. Boa blushed from ear to ear.

"Oh please, I bet you say that to every girl!" she giggled.

'You're so right about that,' Kazuya thought and touched her cheek softly.

"I'll see you later then," Boa said happily. She gave him a quick kiss on the cheek before she left. Kazuya smiled self-satisfied at himself. He brushed his hands over his white shirt and leaned up against the tree, waiting for Jin to show up.

"New prey? She looks good, well better than the last one," a voice said behind him. Toshiya suddenly showed up behind the tree.

"You've been spying on me?" Kazuya asked sending Toshiya a cold stare.

"To be honest, no." Toshiya sent the stare back. "I have to talk to you."

Kazuya rolled his eyes. He put his hands in his pockets and turned so he stood face to face with Toshiya.

"About what?" he asked, clearly showing that he didn't care at all.

"You might have forgotten that you and I are study buddies for English class, and since we're having this big test coming up then." Toshiya spoke slowly and all calm. He kept staring into Kazuya's eyes. Not letting him go for one second. Kazuya gave a short, unsure laugh.

"Why should I care about that? I don't need to study you know," he said and was about to leave.

"By the way, who I am seeing doesn't concern you, at all. Study buddy!"

Toshiya watched Kazuya as he walked away from the tree.

"That's something you think." Toshiya smirked.

Chapter two: Eye to eye

"Sweet Kazuya, what is bothering you?" Boa asked. She looked worried, but it was all a mask. All she ever cared about was her look, her reputation and her nails.

"It's nothing," Kazuya told her. He kept staring out of the window.

Boa snorted and started to concentrate on her nails instead.

'Stupid Hara! How can it be that I can't get him out of my head? Damnit! He like an annoying bug!'

"Oh, are you nervous about the results for your Chemistry test?" Boa suddenly asked. Since Kazuya was one of the most popular, best-looking guys, it was important for her to make a good impression on him.

Then she was sure he would go tell all his friends about how sweet and pretty she was. Boa laid her hand on his.

"I know you'll do just fine!" she flirted.

Kazuya looked at her. This girl wasn't really his type, so why did he say yes to go out with her? Probably just because she was pretty and a lot of the other guys would kill to be in his place right.

"Thank you," he answered shortly. Of course, he would do just fine. Actually, he knew he would do better than just fine.

Next day:

The main topic during lunch, at Kazuya's table, was Boa. His friends kept asking about the date. Though Kazuya tried his best to change subject, it didn't work. Now and then, he stole a look at Toshiya who sat at a table not far from his own. He was wearing a pair of pattern, loose jeans and a black shirt with white print and a skull.

"Kame? Are you listening?" Junno asked and gave Kazuya a friendly push in the back. Kazuya got himself loose from his thoughts and looked at his friends.

"Huh?"

"Well did you get anything? . You know, last night?" Jin asked interested.

Kazuya didn't answer; he just made a weird move with his head, which told his friends that he did. Out of the corner of his eye, could Kazuya see Toshiya who rose from his chair and left the cafeteria.

"Sorry guys. But I have to go! I'll see you later, ok?" Kazuya got up and left the table before his friends could answer him.

Kazuya followed Toshiya outside the school, before he got himself pulled together.

"Hara!" he shouted. Toshiya stopped walked, and turned around.

Their eyes met. Kazuya suddenly felt a weird feeling in his stomach.

"Yes?" Toshiya asked, his voice was cold as ice.

"I want to apologize about yesterday I. If you got time this afternoon, we could start studying?" Toshiya stroked his hair away from his eyes.

"I don't need your help," he finally said. Then he turned around and was about to leave.

"Hey! What did you just say?" Kazuya shouted and followed him.

"I said, I don't need your help!" Toshiya shouted back.

Kazuya was about to explode with anger. His eyes were burning and his fits were clenched.

"What the fag is wrong with you? Yesterday you wanted my help and now! Gaah! Would you make up your mind or." Toshiya suddenly stopped and Kazuya bumped right into him.

"Or what?" Toshiya asked. "What are you going to do, Kamenashi?"

He grabbed Kazuya by his shirt and pulled him closer. They stood so close they could feel each other's breath.

"My place, 4:30 today." Kazuya hissed and Toshiya let him go.

When Toshiya was gone, Kazuya walked back into the school. He cursed inside.

'Who does that little piece of shit think he is? He is not going to play around with me!'

Toshiya walked up the wide, white stairs in front of the huge mansion. He ran his thin fingers through his soft hair and looked around.

The garden was covered with white and blue flowers. Enormous trees lay a relaxing shadow over the balcony. Everything was so disgustingly perfect. He knocked on the door. A few minutes later, it got opened.

Kazuya's head popped out from behind the door. He looked at Toshiya under his messy, wet hair.

"You are early," he said.

"Oh, I'm very sorry," Toshiya said with a brush of sarcasm.

Kazuya rolled his eyes and opened the door. He was only wearing a towel around his waist.

"Sexy," Toshiya smirked as he walked in. Kazuya looked at him and coughed loudly.

They walked upstairs and Kazuya showed the way to his room.

"I'll just get dressed," he said and disappeared into the bathroom. Toshiya sat down on the bed and scratched his neck. Thinking.

Time went on, page after page was turned. Kazuya looked at Toshiya who was sitting only a few centimeters away from him. His eyes were concentrated on the book, he looked so tired.

"Maybe we should stop?" Kazuya suggested, taking of his reading glasses.

Toshiya looked up, hesitated for some seconds. Then he closed his book and yawned.

"This time I think you're right," Toshiya replied. Kazuya raised an eyebrow and coughed slightly.

"Are you saying, that I'm wrong most of the time?" he asked, kind of offended.

Toshiya didn't answer. They looked into each other's eyes. None of them spoke a word. Kazuya swallowed, feeling his heart starting to beat harder. He tried to look away.

'Why do I suddenly feel so dizzy?' he thought. Without thinking, he slowly moved closer to Toshiya. It was like his brain had been switched off, as their lips came closer and closer to each other's. They sat so close, that Kazuya could feel Toshiya's warm breath on his own lips.

"Brrrrriiing brrrriiing!" Kazuya pulled himself back as his cell phone started to ring. He rose from the bed and picked it up. Toshiya blinked a few times, to get himself back to reality.

'Wow, did we just almost kiss?' he thought. He ran his fingers through his hair and sighed deeply.

"I should probably go now," Toshiya said and got up. Kazuya looked over his shoulder. He looked at Toshiya while he got his things packed.

"Umm, ok." Kazuya couldn't get a word out of his mouth.

When Toshiya had left, Kazuya sat on his bed. He kept staring at his watch, didn't know why.

'I had almost kissed Toshiya! Wow.' He bit his lower lip and rested his head in his hands.

'. Wow, hold on! I had almost KISSED A GUY!? WHAT THE FUCK?' Kazuya's eyes widened up as he realized what almost had happened earlier.

'No, no! This can not be true! This can not be true! Oh my freaking God! Am I gay? NO WAY!' He started to walk around in his room.

"I am not gay!" he said out loud. "I am not fucking gay!"

He slammed his hands onto the wall, while he repeated the sentence again and again.

Chapter three: One way or another

The sun shone warm down over the sports ground, where Kazuya was having P.E. class. Theme of the week was soccer. Kazuya and Jin watched the others getting separated in two groups.

"Kamenashi, Akanishi get over here!" the P.E. teacher shouted. Kazuya crossed his arms and looked at Jin. Jin's face expression told clearly that he didn't have any attention of taking part of the games.

"Kamenashi!" the teacher shouted. Kazuya sighed and started to walk slowly towards the others. He looked back at Jin and waved him over.

"Hey! Where are you going?" Kazuya asked as Jin walked away from the playing field.

"I just told Mr. Sung about the bad injure I have on my ankle," Jin grinned and sat down on the grass.

"You suck!" Kazuya shouted. "Damnit I hate soccer!"

He wasn't bad at the game. In fact he was one of the best. But sometimes he just got bored of being so. perfect.

The sweat drops ran down over his forehead. His body was all warm and his heart was beating fast. Kazuya was in lead, he had the ball. It ran in front of him, just waiting for him to kick it into the goal. Suddenly Kazuya felt someone pushing him from the side. He looked over his shoulder.

'Toshiya?' he thought and got all dizzy. Before he knew it, the ball was gone. He looked back and saw Toshiya run away with it.

"Damnit!" Kazuya cursed and hurried after him. He caught up on Toshiya and they started 'fighting' over the ball as they ran side to side.

Kazuya fell over his own legs and bumped right into Toshiya. They both fell to the ground, on top of each other. Kazuya rested exhausted his head on Toshiya's warm chest. They were both breathing heavily. After a few seconds, Kazuya realized where he was laying. He looked at Toshiya who lay right under him. Looked straight into his deep, brown eyes.

"Hey are you two ok?" Mr. Sung came running towards them.

"Huh?" they replied at the same time. They got up and Jin came over to Kazuya.

"Are you ok?" Jin asked. "You look kind of weird." Kazuya looked at him and nodded.

"I'm just fine," he said and stole a look at Toshiya.

Later:

"Are you sure you don't want me to wait for you?" Junno asked Kazuya and swung his sports bag over his shoulder.

"Yeah, it's ok. I'm going to the dentist so," Kazuya said while he put on his jeans.

"Ok, see you tomorrow then!" Junno waved and left the locker room.

Kazuya dried his hair with his towel and looked at himself in the mirror. Another person showed up behind him. He turned around.

"Thanks for the game, you are pretty good," Toshiya said, holding a water bottle in his hands. Kazuya raised an eyebrow and threw the towel on the bench behind him.

"Well, thank you. Same for you!" he said and turned around to close his locker. Suddenly he felt Toshiya's warm breath on his neck.

"Toshiya," he mumbled. He turned around so they faced each other.

Toshiya's hands went slowly up and down over Kazuya's naked upper part of the body. Kazuya moaned slightly, not sure on what to do.

"Do you want me to stop?" Toshiya whispered in his ear. His hair tickled Kazuya on his neck. Kazuya hesitated a bit, before he put his hands on Toshiya's waist and pulled him closer. The sound of a locker being closed, a few rows away, made them jump away from each other.

"I. I better go, I. have an appointment at. the dentist's so." Kazuya pulled a shirt over his head and grabbed his bag.

"I. See you later!" he said before he rushed out of the door.

Chapter four: Kirei da

Toshiya's lovely smell filled Kazuya's nose. The two boys moved closer to each other. They were now so close they only had to move their heads a tiny bit to kiss.

"Kazuya, I want you!" Toshiya whispered hoarse into Kazuya's ear. Their lips met and parted on each other. Kazuya's mouth greeted Toshiya's warm tongue.

"I want you too," Kazuya moaned. With his hands, he started to unbutton Toshiya's shirt. He pulled it of him and threw it on the floor. Kazuya led the way to his bed, where they lay down. He kissed Toshiya passionately, before he slowly moved his head down to Toshiya's warm chest. Toshiya's fingers played with Kazuya's smooth hair, while he moaned softly. They rolled around, so Toshiya lay on top of Kazuya. He started to undress him and then himself. Their warm bodies met, and both felt a delight they had never felt before.

"I love you," Kazuya whispered and pulled Toshiya down to kiss him deeply.

A shrill beep from Kazuya's alarm clock woke him up. He opened his eyes and sat up in the bed. His body was wet of sweat and his hair was a big mess.

"Damnit!" he cursed and got up. He looked at himself in the big wall mirror. He sat down on the floor, hid his face in his hands and sighed deeply. Tired he rubbed his eyes. He had had the same dream again and again for the last week. Every night he dreamt the same thing. Every night he dreamt that he and Toshiya.

"What is happening to me?" he mumbled and got up. He opened the window and let the morning wind cool his face.

At school:

"As you might know, we are having this big English test coming up, which is very important for your grades. Therefore, I hope you all have been studying till the sweat ran from your cheeks!" Mr. Lee jabbered on. Kazuya lay over his table, with his face hid in his arms. Now and then Jin gave him a push on the side, to make sure he didn't fell asleep.

"You look so tired these days. Is something bothering you?" Jin asked. Kazuya looked up at him. He blinked a few times with his tired, red eyes.

"It's. I'm just nervous about the test," he lied. Jin's face expression told obviously didn't believe that excuse. But he didn't say more.

"Well, since I think you all have behaved so well in the previous class today, I'll let you free earlier today." Mr. Lee said and closed his briefcase.

Kazuya strolled down the main hall. His head felt so heavy and his eyes hurt.

'Man, I don't think I've had a good night's sleep since.' Kazuya thought and remember the situation in the locker room.

'Why can't I stop thinking of him? What do I have to do to get him out of my head?'

"Hara!" He heard himself call out, as he saw Toshiya stand underneath the big beech tree. Toshiya looked over his shoulder. His face changed when he saw who it was. His hands started to sweat. His heart was beating harder.

"Kazuya," he greeted as they stood in front of each other. The soft tone in his voice made Kazuya shiver.

"I. I was wondering if you, if you maybe had time to study with me tonight?" Kazuya asked and swallowed. Toshiya nodded slowly, trying hardly to keep his cool fa‡ade.

"I. Ok, I mean sure. That would be, that would be great," he answered and looked down at his feet.

Kazuya rubbed his eyes behind his reading glasses. The thick book which lay in front of him, made him even more tired than he already was. He leaned back into the chair he sat in and let the comfortable music in the radio calm his mind.

"Kiss me, out of the bearded barley. Nightly beside green, green grass." Sixpence non the Richer's song 'Kiss me' streamed out of the speakers. At the chorus, he looked at Toshiya, who was caught in the books.

"Oh kiss me beneath the milky twilight. Lead me, out on the moonlit floor."

"What do you think about me?" Kazuya suddenly asked. Toshiya looked up. He cracked his fingers and smiled widely.

"I think, you look amazingly stupid with those glasses," he said. Kazuya threw a pillow at him.

"I'm serious," he said and crossed his arms. Toshiya laughed.

"Sorry! Hmm ok, seriously? At first, I thought you were a selfish, spoiled brat. But then I got to know you and." Toshiya stopped. Kazuya looked at him, waiting for him to continue.

"And?"

"And I found you. That you are!" Toshiya returned to his book, well knowing that Kazuya now was sitting with a shocked look on his face. Kazuya rose from the chair. Toshiya looked up. They stared at each other.

"I'm not a. I'm not, I am a." Kazuya stuttered. Toshiya laid the book on the table and got up. He stroked his hands over his shirt and frowned.

"What? Well, you haven't proved me wrong yet!" he said, all serious.

"Lift your open hand, strike up the band and make the fireflies dance Silver Moon's sparkling, so kiss me!"

Kazuya took a deep breathe, then he moved closer to Toshiya, grabbed his arms and pulled him into a deep kiss. In shock, Toshiya tried to get free of Kazuya's grip. But then he started to relax. Kazuya's lips were soft and warm. With his hands, he caressed Toshiya's neck.

"I. I'm sorry," Kazuya whispered as he broke the kiss. "I don't know what, what came into me, I."

He turned his back to Toshiya and felt how his lips started to tremble. Toshiya let his finger run slowly over his lips. Did they just kiss?

"Kazuya," he said softly. "You don't have to apologize." He took Kazuya's hands and held him from behind. He rested his head on Kazuya's lean shoulder.

"I didn't mind," he whispered. Carefully he kissed Kazuya's neck. "Do you?" Kazuya swallowed a few times. With girls, he was never nervous or unsure what to do. But this was different. Now he felt insecure and his whole body was shaking. Toshiya's warm touch made his brain crash.

He couldn't think clearly. Suddenly he felt all cold. He realized that Toshiya had let go of his 'hug'. Kazuya turned around. Of some unknown reason, his heart stopped beating so fast, he didn't sweat. Everything seemed so naturally.

"No, I don't mind," he whispered and took Toshiya's hand. Once again met their lips. They dragged each other into a deeper and passionate kiss.

"This is wrong," Kazuya mumbled into Toshiya's mouth.

"I know. It's wonderful." Toshiya replied as they slowly walked towards the bed, still kissing.

Later:

After a lot of kissing and cuddling, the two new lovers lay exhausted on the bed. Kazuya rested his head on Toshiya's naked chest. The slow heartbeat made him drowsy.

"Hmm, how do you feel?" Toshiya mumbled silently. His eyes were closed and he let his fingers run slowly up and down of Kazuya's back.

"Kind of weird. I've never tried to. Kiss a guy before," Kazuya whispered onto Toshiya's chest.

"Me neither. But it wasn't that bad, do you think?" Kazuya shook his head. "No, it was great." he yawned and sat up.

"Kirei da- you are so beautiful," Toshiya smiled, and Kazuya blushed before he lay down again.

"I should probably leave soon. I mean, if your parents should come home," Toshiya said and kissed Kazuya's hair.

"Stay. My parents are on a business trip, so no worries!" Kazuya cuddled closer into him.

Chapter five: How do I say.?

"Kamenashi, I would like to talk to you," Mr. Lee said when the lesson had ended. The rest of the class left the classroom. Jin stayed, standing in the door, waiting for Kazuya.

"Kazuya, I was wondering how it is going with you and your study buddy. Erm, who was it again, Hara right?" Kazuya nodded and swung his bag over his left shoulder.

"Well, I. It's going just fine," Kazuya replied and looked at Jin who was waiting impenitently.

"Are you sure? I mean, I realized how unfair it was just to pair you up with him when. What I am trying to say is, if you want a new partner, it's just ok!" Kazuya faltered.

"No it is just fine," he finally said. Jin coughed from the door.

"What was that all about? Why didn't you want to change? Maybe you could get in group with me and Junno!" Jin said, kicking all the stones he met on the sidewalk. Kazuya raised his shoulders.

"What? That Toshimasa guy is like so totally weird! Such a loser!"

Jin's word made Kazuya stop at once. He looked cold at his friend.

"There's nothing wrong with Toshiya!" he busted out in anger. He soon realized he'd made a mistake. Jin looked surprised at him.

"Seriously, what's up with you man? You've been acting so weird lately!" Jin stroked his hair away from his eyes and looked worried at Kazuya.

"It's nothing, I'm just. tired, ok?" Kazuya answered shortly and looked down at the ground.

It had been three days since Kazuya and Toshiya had had their first, and only, kiss. They hadn't been talking to each other since. Kazuya felt a stone in his heart each time he looked at Toshiya. He knew he couldn't just walk over to him and talk to him. His friends, everyone would think he had gone crazy.

'I hope you know, how much I miss you,' he thought as he walked up the stairs to his home. He found his keys in his jacket pocket and was about to unlock the door, when.

"A rose?" Kazuya bend down and picked it up. A card was following.

'There's an awkward silence in the air. My heart is beating so rapidly. It's going to burst from wanting you. But my lips are shy. How do I say .'

"Toshiya.?" Kazuya turned the card.

'Meet me in the park, tonight at 8:30' A feeling of joy and happiness rushed through his body. He smiled and held the rose close to his chest as he walked into the house.

At the park:

Kazuya pulled his shirtsleeve up and looked at his watch for the 100th time. He walked nervously around a bench and now and then, he tossed a look on the lake, which lay peacefully behind him.

"Why do you look so nervous?" a voice suddenly said.

Toshiya laid his arms around Kazuya from behind and gave him a quick kiss on the neck He felt Kazuya's doubtfulness and loosened his grip around his waist.

"What is wrong?" Toshiya asked. They sat down on the bench. Kazuya swung his legs back and forth, thoughtfully. He sighed.

"I'm not sure. I'm not sure about this," he said. Toshiya opened his mouth to speak, but Kazuya stopped him.

"I just, I just feel so weird when. Even when you just look at me. I don't know what to do, or what to say. I'm so confused!" Kazuya rose from the bench and started to walk around in circles.

"Well you know, it isn't easy for me either!" Toshiya was starting to sound quite aggressive. Kazuya looked at him. He didn't have a clue of what to say.

"I'm sorry, but I had never in my most crazy imagination thought of myself being. gay!" Now Toshiya stood up too. He looked sad and angry at the same time.

"Why do you say it that way?" he asked disappointed. "Do you really think being. Being in love with another guy is so. wrong?" Kazuya's eyes widened up. He felt something fall from his heart. Toshiya looked at him for a last second, before he turned around and walked away.

"Toshiya, Toshiya wait!" Kazuya shouted and ran after him.

He grabbed Toshiya's arm and stopped him from walking away.

"I. I didn't know you were. In love, with me." Toshiya gave a short but cold laugh and got his arm loose.

"Then what did you think? That I would just play around with you, and use you? I'm not like you Kamenashi!" With those words, Toshiya turned around and walked away with fast steps. A card lay on the ground where he had stood. Kazuya picked it up, brushed the dirt away and read it.

'How can I say this? Why won't the words come out? If only time would freeze like this, so I can think of something great to say. The love I feel for you. I need you. I want your love. How do I say.' He turned the card, slowly in his hands.

'. I love you.'

Chapter six: Destiny

The following days was Kazuya sitting in his room, refusing to talk with anyone. Each day, when he came home from school, he went straight to his room. His parents, who for once were at home, looked worried at him, when they saw him. Kazuya lay on his bed, cuddled together, hugging his pillow tightly. Toshiya's words kept repeating in his head. His deep, wonderful voice.

'I'm not like you Kamenashi.' Kazuya swallowed and closed his eyes hardly together not to cry.

'. I love you.' Kazuya himself, had never tried to be really in love before. Sure, he had had a lot of girlfriends, but none of them had made him feel like Toshiya had.

"I love you too," Kazuya whispered. It felt so right, to say those words.

'But it's wrong. It's wrong for two guys to love each other.' He sat up, still hugging his pillow. He remembered their kisses and hugs. Their warm bodies against each other's.

'So what if it's wrong? I don't give a damn!' Kazuya got up from the bed and threw the pillow on the bed.

Kaoru Niikura looked worried at Toshiya as he emptied yet another bottle of alcohol. The ashtray was filled with smoked cigarettes.

"Toshiya," Kaoru said and snatched the new bottle out of Toshiya's hand.

"I think you've had enough." Toshiya looked at him, and busted out in laughter.

"No way! What are you talking about?" he said and tried to light a cigarette. Kaoru sighed as Toshiya nearly had burned his own hair off.

"It's . Enough! Tell me what's bothering you!" Kaoru demanded. Toshiya lay down on the floor. Silently he started to sob. Kaoru kneeled down next to him. He helped him to sit up and stroked him over his hair.

"Kaoru-san, I need your help! Badly." Toshiya murmured. His eyes were blank and it looked like he was close to crying.

"Toshiya-kun. I'll always be here for you! You know you can trust me."

Kaoru had been Toshiya's best friend for the last several years. He was like an older brother to him.

"I'm in love!" Toshiya shouted aloud. He felt his body get all weak and he rested his head on Kaoru's lap.

". With a guy. With a selfish, ego centered, spoiled. I love him Kaoru. What am I going to do?" Toshiya cried. Kaoru patted him on his head.

"Does he know?" he asked. Toshiya nodded with tears falling from his eyes. He sniffed and tried to dry his eyes.

"Well, what how does he feel about you?"

"I. I don't know. I thought he liked me too. But then I. He. I don't know! He is confusing me."

Next day:

The last lesson had finished and Toshiya stood at his locker, putting his books in order.

Suddenly someone smacked a note up on his cupboard door.

Toshiya looked to his side. Kazuya stood right next to him, holding a small piece of paper in front of his face.

"Kirei da, aishiteru!" he whispered with a smile. Then he put the note into Toshiya's hand and walked away.

Toshiya caught up on him in front of the main entrance. Both knew they couldn't do anything while they still were inside the school.They turned around a corner and made sure no one had seen them. Then Kazuya grabbed Toshiya's hand and dragged him into the tool shed. There was less space than Kazuya had thought, so they had to stand very close to each other.

"I am sorry I was such an asshole. I hope you can forgive me, because. Because I'm falling in love with you," Kazuya whispered nervously. Toshiya gazed at him. He waited a few seconds, before he laid his arms around Kazuya and smiled.

"I have already fallen in love with you," he said, about to cry. They moved closer and met each other in a warm kiss.

Chapter seven: When I look in your eyes

It was a warm Friday. The last lesson had just started, and almost all the students lay over their tables, sleeping. Toshiya sat on his seat, close to fall asleep, when a small paper ball landed on his table. He picked it up and opened it.

'To celebrate our 1 month anniversary, I'd like to invite my love out. Will you accept this poor proposal?' Toshiya looked up and saw Kazuya who looked over his shoulder, and smiled at him. Toshiya smiled back and put the note down in his pocket.

Though they had been together for one month, they had still kept their relationship as a secret. Both had accepted the fact that they'd fallen in love with a person by the same gender, but they knew other people would look different at it. Therefore had Toshiya a perfect plan for the evening.

Kazuya hurried out to the front door, as the doorbell rang. His parents was out of town again, so he had the house for himself.

"Wow," Kazuya looked surprised at the person who was standing outside.

"Toshiya?"

"Yes, love?" Toshiya winked at him, with his long, fake eyelashes. "Well, since you were the one who invited me out. I thought it was me who should be the girl for tonight," he laughed. He was wearing a long black dress, which revealed his lean body. His hair was tied up, except some in the front which fell over his right eye. He eyes were 'painted' with dark-blue and

"You look. Um, like a girl?" Kazuya said, though, with a smile.

"What? You don't like it?" Toshiya asked, pouting. He let his finger run down along Kazuya's collar.

"We could just stay here at your place if you want to," he grinned. Kazuya looked suspiciously at him.

"No, I promised to take you out, so I'm going to. I'll just get my jacket."

"I love you," Toshiya smiled and gave him a kiss on the cheek.

". I love you too," Kazuya said and kissed him back. "And you look gorgeous!"

The weak lights gave the restaurant a comfortable, romantic atmosphere.

Toshiya and Kazuya sat at the window, in a corner. Enjoying each other's company.

"This is so." Kazuya whispered as he felt Toshiya's hand on his thigh, under the table.

". So hot?" Toshiya grinned, moving his hand upwards. Kazuya's face turned red in a second. His grabbed Toshiya's hand and tried to move it away.

"Toshiya!" Kazuya whispered embarrassed, as the waiter came towards their table.

"Aren't your parents at home?" Toshiya asked, when Kazuya dragged him into the mansion. Kazuya shook his head and closed the door behind them.

"No, they are in Brazil for two weeks, so no need to worry." he smiled. He led the way to his bedroom and locked the door.

"Just in case," he said and put the key in his pocket. Toshiya sat down on the bed and took the high-heeled shoes off. He rubbed his sore feet, and wondered how girls could survive, wearing those things. He untied his hair and pulled it. He watched Kazuya who was searching for a CD in his big CD collection. His took one out and put it in the CD player.

"I'm too sexy for my love, too sexy for my love. Love, love is going to leave!" Kazuya grinned at Toshiya as the song started. He walked slowly towards his lover, moving his hips, seductive, from side to side.

"I'm too sexy for my shirt, too sexy for my shirt. So sexy it hurts!" Kazuya sang along and started to unbutton his own shirt. Toshiya sat on the bed, watching him with a smile.

"I'm a model, ya know what I mean! And I do my little turn on the catwalk. Yeah on the catwalk, on the catwalk yeah. I do my little turn on the catwalk." Kazuya pushed Toshiya down on the bed and crawled up on top of him. Kazuya kissed his neck and dragged carefully the dress off him.

"Yes you are, way too sexy." Toshiya grinned and kissed him softly.

As they suddenly lay almost naked with each other, they stopped and looked at one another for a second.

"Are you sure?" Toshiya asked and stroked Kazuya's hair. They looked into each other's eyes. Both felt a somewhat new feeling inside.

"I am, if you are?" Kazuya answered with a question. Toshiya faltered, before he nodded.

"Please, don't leave me." Toshiya whispered against Kazuya's bare chest.

The two lovers cuddled closer into eachother.

"I won't ever leave you, Toshiya. You make me feel so special. No one as ever made me feel this way before."

They fell asleep in each other's arms, both with a smile on their lips.

Chapter eight: What dreams are made of

Monday morning: